So today was the day of my student teacher's midterm. We met with her supervisor and the two of us and we go over her performance as a whole this far. I was super excited and dreading it a little because here was my chance to really lay it all out for her with someone else there to back me up. I had an entire "speech" prepared to tell her about the two things that she really needed to work on with examples for when she gave an excuse about why she didn't do it. She is the queen of excuses let me just tell you.
So before that meeting we had a site leadership meeting where a representative of each grade level comes together to have a meeting with our principal. She shows up late (on her midterm day let me remind you) to this meeting. Aside from the fact that I have a very low tolerance for tardiness (espcially chronic tardiness) she walks in late to a meeting with the guy that has the potential to hire her. If anything she should have been 10 minutes early. So that didn't start the morning off super.
Back to the midterm. We go in and I am all set and ready to lay it down for her. Her supervisor started right in and said that we noticed that she didn't handle stress very well (that was a nice way of saying she is snotty when we give her suggestions) and asked if everything was ok at home. She immediately got this look on her face like I should know what the hell is going on...my intern hasn't said anything to me that something was wrong at home. This was my intern's response:
"well yeah it's fine...but this is the first time Angie is going to hear this but I went to the Dr. on Monday and I am pregnant!"
The only thought that instantaneously went through my head was FUCK! I know I should be happy for her and her husband but she already doesn't take criticism well or even simple suggestions...add pregnant hormones in with that and I should have gray hairs by the end of April. How am I supposed to drop this massive bomb of badassness (you like the word) and tell her how to be a better teacher after that comment? Yeah she took the wind out of my sails and depleated my speech right out the window. I did however, stay strong and still tell her that she can't take everything so personal. If the kids don't get it, it't not always her fault. Maybe it's just really hard and they need more practice. If they are trying their very very hardest, you can't get frustrated and upset with the kids. They struggle with reading and just because it came easy for her it doesn't for these two that she gets upset with (she informed us that this was the reason she gets frustrated because she doesn't understand why it is hard).
After the initial shock of hearing that on top of dealing with her being difficult to work with at times, I got over it and realized that I was happy for her. She is happy to be pregnant but at the same time her and her husband just moved into a one bedroom apartment and while they have talked about kids, and are ok with having them now, now just wasn't the very best time so I can see why she would be very stressed out. Plus this is going to make getting a job difficult for her because it is going to be her first year and she is going to have to take 8 weeks off. Your first year is hard and having a baby will make it even harder.
Then she said that the kids couldn't give her more than two books at a time because she doesn't want to kill her baby. I understand she doesnt' need to be lifting a lot of things that are heavy (she works at a warehouse and is going to have to really cut back on her lifting there) but seriously three science books are not going to strain the baby.
You can now see how I am excited for her and also dreading this. She is full of excuses now as it is and I can just hear why she can't do something now because of her baby.
Thursday, March 08, 2007
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
What a weekend
Alright I know you have missed my mindless drabble, but geez what a weekend I had. I went home to see my dad. He got to get out of the hospital on Saturday but had to go home with oxygen. He was really pissed because he didn't want to stay and the stupid doctor didn't come in until like 4 on Saturday so he had to sit there and just wait. Oh my gosh he was so angry. Then we got him home with his oxygen and he was a little better. So in that department we are doing ok. He has a follow up on Monday and we will see what happens there.
On my little weekend escapade, Dave and I decided to teach Allie and Anthony (my niece and nephew) how to play Bullshit the card game. We chose to clean it up some and we called it BS. Watching my 5 year old neice play this was hysterical. My nephew is a horrible liar so she just sat there and called BS at the top of her lungs everytime he layed down a card. We finally got him to understand you have to try to lie in the game and keep a straight face, but then we couldn't get her to quit calling it. I had planned to write this blog much earlier, but then after you read the next paragraph you will understand why I was delayed. Anyway I can't remember all of her witty comments, but I have a few. We took the dog for a walk and she informed me that she couldn't wait to grow up. When I said well you are only 5 she reminded me that she "couldn't wait to be 16 so she could be a mommy!" Yeah that's a direct quote. I informed her that she might want to wait a few years AFTER 16 to be a mommy when she has a better idea of what mommies do. Then my sister was telling us a story and she was trying to hide something from my nephew becuase it's a surprise for him and (keep in mind this is maybe a few hours after teaching Allie to play bullshit) my niece proclaimed at the top of her lungs, MAMA THAT'S BULLSHIT...YOU HAVE A HORRIBLE BULLSHIT FACE! I about died laughing right there. I was absolutely classic and I wish I could have had a camera for it. Yeah I then had to "unteach" the game to her...or at least explain that she can only say BS and she can't say the bad word.
To top off my weekend Dave's dad got three flat tires going out to my brother-in-law's family's ranch. Dave went to get him and I had the dog. Who by the way was a pain in the ass! Long story short he sat and whined the whole time even though I was there and then he decided to go into our basement. As I went down to get him, I apparently forgot that there were more stairs and fell down the rest. I landed so hard on my ankle I could barely stand. Now I was pissed at the dog and was in a bad mood myself. I went to the DR yesterday and had X-rays. The wonderful people there received them this morning, however, did not feel it necessary to let me know the results of my own X-ray. I called 4 times today to get some answers. I had a pretty good idea that it wasn't broken but I had fractured the same ankle in high school and had a lot less swelling. It looks like I have a golf ball sticking off my ankle. So I marched to the office today after school and said I have called all day and while you don't feel it necessary to let me know what the hell is going on, I would love to know. My X-rays were normal so no breaks or fractures. Now I just need to get the swelling down and take care of the sprain.
Ugh that was my fun and wonderful weekend. Look for more on the student teaching experience later tonight or tomorrow!
On my little weekend escapade, Dave and I decided to teach Allie and Anthony (my niece and nephew) how to play Bullshit the card game. We chose to clean it up some and we called it BS. Watching my 5 year old neice play this was hysterical. My nephew is a horrible liar so she just sat there and called BS at the top of her lungs everytime he layed down a card. We finally got him to understand you have to try to lie in the game and keep a straight face, but then we couldn't get her to quit calling it. I had planned to write this blog much earlier, but then after you read the next paragraph you will understand why I was delayed. Anyway I can't remember all of her witty comments, but I have a few. We took the dog for a walk and she informed me that she couldn't wait to grow up. When I said well you are only 5 she reminded me that she "couldn't wait to be 16 so she could be a mommy!" Yeah that's a direct quote. I informed her that she might want to wait a few years AFTER 16 to be a mommy when she has a better idea of what mommies do. Then my sister was telling us a story and she was trying to hide something from my nephew becuase it's a surprise for him and (keep in mind this is maybe a few hours after teaching Allie to play bullshit) my niece proclaimed at the top of her lungs, MAMA THAT'S BULLSHIT...YOU HAVE A HORRIBLE BULLSHIT FACE! I about died laughing right there. I was absolutely classic and I wish I could have had a camera for it. Yeah I then had to "unteach" the game to her...or at least explain that she can only say BS and she can't say the bad word.
To top off my weekend Dave's dad got three flat tires going out to my brother-in-law's family's ranch. Dave went to get him and I had the dog. Who by the way was a pain in the ass! Long story short he sat and whined the whole time even though I was there and then he decided to go into our basement. As I went down to get him, I apparently forgot that there were more stairs and fell down the rest. I landed so hard on my ankle I could barely stand. Now I was pissed at the dog and was in a bad mood myself. I went to the DR yesterday and had X-rays. The wonderful people there received them this morning, however, did not feel it necessary to let me know the results of my own X-ray. I called 4 times today to get some answers. I had a pretty good idea that it wasn't broken but I had fractured the same ankle in high school and had a lot less swelling. It looks like I have a golf ball sticking off my ankle. So I marched to the office today after school and said I have called all day and while you don't feel it necessary to let me know what the hell is going on, I would love to know. My X-rays were normal so no breaks or fractures. Now I just need to get the swelling down and take care of the sprain.
Ugh that was my fun and wonderful weekend. Look for more on the student teaching experience later tonight or tomorrow!
Thursday, March 01, 2007
Life
After losing my mom almost three years ago, the value of having your parents around was more apparent than ever. Yesterday, my sister called to tell me that my dad wasn't feeling well. Ok no biggie right, the guy is allowed to get sick once in a while. Well by lunch time, he had passed out in the hall and had thrown up. So he landed himself in the emergency room. My sister was very worried that he was going to have pnuemnoia and that was not going to be good. Turns out that he has bronchitus and they are wondering if he might have a blockage somewhere near his prostrate. He had the option of going home with oxygen and an antibiotic because the Dr. knew my sister was used to taking care of sick people from when my mom was sick or he could stay in the hospital. He chose to stay in the hospital which made me feel better because it will give my sister some piece of mind. The Dr. said that his chest x-ray was the best it could be for someone who was 74 so that was good. But they are going to get back some more blood work today to see what else is going on. His blood sugar was really high when they brought him in and then the prostate thing so we will see today hopefully.
The thing that kills me is the entire time I am hearing all of this (I got pulled from my classroom yesterday because she called the school to tell me) all I could think was I only have one parent left. I'll be 25 in July...people shouldn't have to lose their parents until they are into their like 50s...I guess it's a downfall of having parents that had me when they were much older. But still...I never got to tell my mom about my first day of school as a teacher...she died a month before school started. She will never get to see me get married or meet my children. Even though my dad is healthy overall, I still can't help but think he is 74 and what if something happens to him too? Then he won't get to see me get married or meet my kids. I only knew my mom's mom and she died when I was five so I grew up with no grandparents. I don't want my kids to do the same, at least having no grandparents from my side of the family.
So I guess we will see how today goes. Hopefully I don't get any more emergency calls during school...
The thing that kills me is the entire time I am hearing all of this (I got pulled from my classroom yesterday because she called the school to tell me) all I could think was I only have one parent left. I'll be 25 in July...people shouldn't have to lose their parents until they are into their like 50s...I guess it's a downfall of having parents that had me when they were much older. But still...I never got to tell my mom about my first day of school as a teacher...she died a month before school started. She will never get to see me get married or meet my children. Even though my dad is healthy overall, I still can't help but think he is 74 and what if something happens to him too? Then he won't get to see me get married or meet my kids. I only knew my mom's mom and she died when I was five so I grew up with no grandparents. I don't want my kids to do the same, at least having no grandparents from my side of the family.
So I guess we will see how today goes. Hopefully I don't get any more emergency calls during school...
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Cat VS Dog
Yesterday we decided that it would be smart to try to introduce the dog and cat again. This is because, Quincy, the dog, sits at our bedroom door sniffing so loud that I'm sure the neighbors can hear him. Sometimes the cat is on the other side of the door and sticks a paw out to egg it on, and sometimes he is laying on the bed and the dog is just going crazy.
So Dave had the idea to put Tiny, the cat, into his kitty kennel and let Quincy sniff him out. Yeah that didn't go quite as planned. It was hilarious don't get me wrong, but I'm surprised that my cat was still speaking to me this morning. Quincy went ape shit on the kennel sniffing it like mad and pushing it all around. Finally Dave put it up against a wall and put his foot on it. Well it was like Quincy was trying to bite the bars, but he was wagging his tail the whole time. So I'm not sure if that meant he liked the cat or he just thought he was doing something good. Tiny on the other hand, did not find this one bit amusing. He hissed and growled and turned into a giant puff ball. He was good about being in there and he got lots of treats for trying to help us out. Dave was like I've never heard a cat growl...oh yeah only when they are in strict attack mode and are so pissed off they are going to attack the next thing within a paws reach. He raised his paw like 5 times and Dave was hoping that he would stick it through the bars and just snag Quincy, dousing his interest in the cat. But no, Tiny didn't do that. So really the whole kitty in the kennel thing wasn't as helpful as we were hoping. As I speak Quincy is at the bedroom door sniffing his heart out.
I am hoping they can get along. I think the dog wants to play and the cat understands that dog is not a friend. I hate having Tiny live in the bedroom while we have the dog here. It keeps turning into more and more time. Dave's dad finished the fence but Quincy ran away last weekend because he jumped it. So now he is going to build a kennel run with a roof. But Quincy loves Dave and when we took him to Fernley the other night while we went to Fallon, he cried and whined the whole time and was a total pill. Yep just like dropping off the grandkids!! So either Quincy needs to learn to deal with Fernley, or we are going to permanently have a dog. And we aren't supposed to have any pets at all! It is much easier to hide the cat from the landlord...the dog won't be so easy!
So Dave had the idea to put Tiny, the cat, into his kitty kennel and let Quincy sniff him out. Yeah that didn't go quite as planned. It was hilarious don't get me wrong, but I'm surprised that my cat was still speaking to me this morning. Quincy went ape shit on the kennel sniffing it like mad and pushing it all around. Finally Dave put it up against a wall and put his foot on it. Well it was like Quincy was trying to bite the bars, but he was wagging his tail the whole time. So I'm not sure if that meant he liked the cat or he just thought he was doing something good. Tiny on the other hand, did not find this one bit amusing. He hissed and growled and turned into a giant puff ball. He was good about being in there and he got lots of treats for trying to help us out. Dave was like I've never heard a cat growl...oh yeah only when they are in strict attack mode and are so pissed off they are going to attack the next thing within a paws reach. He raised his paw like 5 times and Dave was hoping that he would stick it through the bars and just snag Quincy, dousing his interest in the cat. But no, Tiny didn't do that. So really the whole kitty in the kennel thing wasn't as helpful as we were hoping. As I speak Quincy is at the bedroom door sniffing his heart out.
I am hoping they can get along. I think the dog wants to play and the cat understands that dog is not a friend. I hate having Tiny live in the bedroom while we have the dog here. It keeps turning into more and more time. Dave's dad finished the fence but Quincy ran away last weekend because he jumped it. So now he is going to build a kennel run with a roof. But Quincy loves Dave and when we took him to Fernley the other night while we went to Fallon, he cried and whined the whole time and was a total pill. Yep just like dropping off the grandkids!! So either Quincy needs to learn to deal with Fernley, or we are going to permanently have a dog. And we aren't supposed to have any pets at all! It is much easier to hide the cat from the landlord...the dog won't be so easy!
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Lying, Cheating and the words Fuck You
Sorry for such the harsh title, but hey that's just what this blog is all about. So I teach third grade. I have always said, I teach kids therefore I need no birth control. Today was one of those days where I could come home and throw the pills away because I won't be needing any hormones to deter me from having kids.
Actually it started yesterday. One of my little girls, the sweetest girl you could imagine, cheated on a test. Now she is special ed and me being a bone head didn't really think about her accommodations for the test because she just was qualified as special ed. She has always done the tests before, flunked them, then redid them for a higher grade. Well yesterday she was so frustrated and wanted to please me so much, she cheated on the test. Yes in her mind this made more sense than asking for help or saying it was hard. And all of my kids know how I feel about cheating. It is unacceptable. Well I figured out that she cheated and when I asked her of course she said she didn't cheat. So I told her I could give her the test again now that everyone was done, she could do it over and if she didn't get the same exact answers what would I think...and she said that she copied. Bingo! So I asked her the same question in a variety of ways while making her another copy of the test. Finally on the last page she admitted that she cheated. So I sent her to the back table on the verge of tears to do the test. I talked to the teacher next door to me because she has many years of experience and I just couldn't believe that this little girl cheated. We decided that yes she did it and it's wrong, but she didn't do it because she was a little shit...she was frustrated and this way made sense to fix the frustration. Well our special ed teacher who loves her to death and my student teacher all said to just give her an F to learn her lesson. NO! I did what my mom did to her..."I'm not mad at you, but I am very disappointed in your choice." BINGO came the tears. Yes moms out there, you are never mad at your kids, you are always disappointed in their choice (not disappointed in them) because when your parents are disappointed in you...it hurts way worse than any possible punishment. So today I read the test to her as an accommodation because I really wanted to know what she knew about fact and opinion not if she could read it. I already know she can't read it. So she cried for 20 minutes and I reminded her that everyone makes mistakes that's why we have erasers. Today was a better day for her. That takes care of lying and cheating.
Now for the words fuck you. At the very end of the day today, my class was picking up the floor. A child found a sticker that went on one of my books (I use stickers to tell the level...yeah my room is very anally put together for that stuff) and I knew which child had lost it because of the level it said. So I pointed out to this little boy that he needed to find the book he was reading so we could put it back on. The girl who found the sticker quickly told me that she saw him write in the book with marker...OH NO HE DIDN'T! I stress the entire first month of school and probably once a month how to treat my classroom library. (so you understand...I have over 800 books and if you average that each book is $5 yeah that's $4,000 worth of my money that I have spent in three years to make my classroom literature rich...yes it's a good thing...seeing $4,000 in three years written down makes me want to vomit!) You put my books away neatly, they are never to be kept in your desk, and you are never to take them home. If something happens to a book you tell me immediately so that it can be fixed and the problem doesn't get worse. Back to the kid...he brings me the book and he has written on the sticker on the front with black marker...traced over what I wrote. So that means the sticker isn't even from that book, but why did he write on my book. I get annoyed, but that's not that bad. Then I start looking at the book and it looks like it's had water spilled. Hmm...I ask if he took it home and he said no. But he said no...then because the pages are all funky with water and it opened up to the very back page. This is what I find...2.8/.5 and FUCK YOU and then another student's name at the bottom. Ok I really don't like my pages being torn or bent...how do you think I will feel about a kid writing FUCK YOU? Livid that's how I felt! So I asked him and he said that he didn't write that he only wrote the 2.8. Oh that's right and the desk fairy wrote it in the same black marker in the same handwriting. Hmm interesting. So he had his chance with me and then he got to visit the principal with me. Well the one nice thing about our principal is that he stands behind his teachers no matter what. I was looking for a Saturday school...they have to come to school on Saturday from 9-1130 for a punishment. Well he lied to the principal like 5 times when he was asked each time if he did it and when he said he was going to call his dad he was like ok I did it. Well Dad showed up and Dad was ten times more mad than me. Yeah I didn't get my Saturday school...no he got suspended for tomorrow! Whoa...more than I was wanting but it got the point across. He was thinking he was going to revoke his variance which means he would then have to go to his zoned school making it hard on his dad. But the principal gave him this as a warning and then if he messes up again he is out. YIKES!!! So he had to pay for the book, and his dad doesn't want him to have recess all next week, and he can't use my classroom library. There that takes care of lying (again) and Fuck you.
And you know, I say they are good birth control, and yet, I drive to work in the morning and think about how much I enjoy my job. I truly love teaching, even on days like this!
Actually it started yesterday. One of my little girls, the sweetest girl you could imagine, cheated on a test. Now she is special ed and me being a bone head didn't really think about her accommodations for the test because she just was qualified as special ed. She has always done the tests before, flunked them, then redid them for a higher grade. Well yesterday she was so frustrated and wanted to please me so much, she cheated on the test. Yes in her mind this made more sense than asking for help or saying it was hard. And all of my kids know how I feel about cheating. It is unacceptable. Well I figured out that she cheated and when I asked her of course she said she didn't cheat. So I told her I could give her the test again now that everyone was done, she could do it over and if she didn't get the same exact answers what would I think...and she said that she copied. Bingo! So I asked her the same question in a variety of ways while making her another copy of the test. Finally on the last page she admitted that she cheated. So I sent her to the back table on the verge of tears to do the test. I talked to the teacher next door to me because she has many years of experience and I just couldn't believe that this little girl cheated. We decided that yes she did it and it's wrong, but she didn't do it because she was a little shit...she was frustrated and this way made sense to fix the frustration. Well our special ed teacher who loves her to death and my student teacher all said to just give her an F to learn her lesson. NO! I did what my mom did to her..."I'm not mad at you, but I am very disappointed in your choice." BINGO came the tears. Yes moms out there, you are never mad at your kids, you are always disappointed in their choice (not disappointed in them) because when your parents are disappointed in you...it hurts way worse than any possible punishment. So today I read the test to her as an accommodation because I really wanted to know what she knew about fact and opinion not if she could read it. I already know she can't read it. So she cried for 20 minutes and I reminded her that everyone makes mistakes that's why we have erasers. Today was a better day for her. That takes care of lying and cheating.
Now for the words fuck you. At the very end of the day today, my class was picking up the floor. A child found a sticker that went on one of my books (I use stickers to tell the level...yeah my room is very anally put together for that stuff) and I knew which child had lost it because of the level it said. So I pointed out to this little boy that he needed to find the book he was reading so we could put it back on. The girl who found the sticker quickly told me that she saw him write in the book with marker...OH NO HE DIDN'T! I stress the entire first month of school and probably once a month how to treat my classroom library. (so you understand...I have over 800 books and if you average that each book is $5 yeah that's $4,000 worth of my money that I have spent in three years to make my classroom literature rich...yes it's a good thing...seeing $4,000 in three years written down makes me want to vomit!) You put my books away neatly, they are never to be kept in your desk, and you are never to take them home. If something happens to a book you tell me immediately so that it can be fixed and the problem doesn't get worse. Back to the kid...he brings me the book and he has written on the sticker on the front with black marker...traced over what I wrote. So that means the sticker isn't even from that book, but why did he write on my book. I get annoyed, but that's not that bad. Then I start looking at the book and it looks like it's had water spilled. Hmm...I ask if he took it home and he said no. But he said no...then because the pages are all funky with water and it opened up to the very back page. This is what I find...2.8/.5 and FUCK YOU and then another student's name at the bottom. Ok I really don't like my pages being torn or bent...how do you think I will feel about a kid writing FUCK YOU? Livid that's how I felt! So I asked him and he said that he didn't write that he only wrote the 2.8. Oh that's right and the desk fairy wrote it in the same black marker in the same handwriting. Hmm interesting. So he had his chance with me and then he got to visit the principal with me. Well the one nice thing about our principal is that he stands behind his teachers no matter what. I was looking for a Saturday school...they have to come to school on Saturday from 9-1130 for a punishment. Well he lied to the principal like 5 times when he was asked each time if he did it and when he said he was going to call his dad he was like ok I did it. Well Dad showed up and Dad was ten times more mad than me. Yeah I didn't get my Saturday school...no he got suspended for tomorrow! Whoa...more than I was wanting but it got the point across. He was thinking he was going to revoke his variance which means he would then have to go to his zoned school making it hard on his dad. But the principal gave him this as a warning and then if he messes up again he is out. YIKES!!! So he had to pay for the book, and his dad doesn't want him to have recess all next week, and he can't use my classroom library. There that takes care of lying (again) and Fuck you.
And you know, I say they are good birth control, and yet, I drive to work in the morning and think about how much I enjoy my job. I truly love teaching, even on days like this!
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Droppy Boobs
My niece and nephew are very entertaining little creatures. At times, you never know which one is going to come up with the more clever saying to just make you laugh hysterically. On Saturday, it was pretty much a toss up who would win.
My sister called to tell me the funny story. They were watching Dog Eat Dog on the Game show network. Because they have dish I couldn't watch it until three hours later but I swore I would watch just to see what the kids were talking about. When Anthony was around 5ish...we would watch Maury Povich with my dad...my dad hates talk shows. He will only watch Montell and only if Sylvia Brown isn't on and he will make an exception and watch Maury Povich if it's a show about is it a girl or a guy...those are great. If he says a girl and it's a guy he says...son of a bitch that's a man?? You would have to know my dad to truly appreciate that statement. Anyway...one day we were watching one of these shows and Anthony said how do you know if it's a girl or a boy? Well I then taught him how to spot fake boobies! I told him that if they were really really round like a coconut and they didn't really move...they were fake. The kid has never forgotten that talk. One time in the mall he grabbed my hand and said look tia, she has coconut boobies!! So it's always been a joke around our house or our code for when we see a nice set of purchased boobs. (Yes I realize I could have taught the kid something else, but I was going for life skills here people).
Back to Saturday. On the show, there was a girl who had some huge boobs. Then came a commercial where a girl was running across the beach and her boobs didn't move AT ALL. I watched it three hours later and he did a good job of spotting the coconuts. His dad was cracking all kinds of jokes I guess and Anthony and his friend were laughing really hard. Then my sister said that with the straightest face as though he was answering a question in school Anthony said, "You know when they are really round like that and they don't move, they are called coconut boobs and they are fake. But if the are a little droopy, they are real." My brother-in-law was like and you are an expert on this since when...of course I'm expecting to get blamed but my sister said there was no time because Allie came right in with a comment of her own. Anthony is 10 and Allie is 5. Here were her thoughts on the subject. "Momma's boobs are really droppy so they must be extra real!!" I about died...you see she didn't say droopy like Anthony...no she said droppy even better. Of course my poor sister wanted to just die in front of Anthony's friends but she couldn't quit laughing long enough to do so.
I told you they were entertaining creatures. So ladies...enjoy your coconut boobs or your droopy/droppy boobs...whichever may fit you best!!
My sister called to tell me the funny story. They were watching Dog Eat Dog on the Game show network. Because they have dish I couldn't watch it until three hours later but I swore I would watch just to see what the kids were talking about. When Anthony was around 5ish...we would watch Maury Povich with my dad...my dad hates talk shows. He will only watch Montell and only if Sylvia Brown isn't on and he will make an exception and watch Maury Povich if it's a show about is it a girl or a guy...those are great. If he says a girl and it's a guy he says...son of a bitch that's a man?? You would have to know my dad to truly appreciate that statement. Anyway...one day we were watching one of these shows and Anthony said how do you know if it's a girl or a boy? Well I then taught him how to spot fake boobies! I told him that if they were really really round like a coconut and they didn't really move...they were fake. The kid has never forgotten that talk. One time in the mall he grabbed my hand and said look tia, she has coconut boobies!! So it's always been a joke around our house or our code for when we see a nice set of purchased boobs. (Yes I realize I could have taught the kid something else, but I was going for life skills here people).
Back to Saturday. On the show, there was a girl who had some huge boobs. Then came a commercial where a girl was running across the beach and her boobs didn't move AT ALL. I watched it three hours later and he did a good job of spotting the coconuts. His dad was cracking all kinds of jokes I guess and Anthony and his friend were laughing really hard. Then my sister said that with the straightest face as though he was answering a question in school Anthony said, "You know when they are really round like that and they don't move, they are called coconut boobs and they are fake. But if the are a little droopy, they are real." My brother-in-law was like and you are an expert on this since when...of course I'm expecting to get blamed but my sister said there was no time because Allie came right in with a comment of her own. Anthony is 10 and Allie is 5. Here were her thoughts on the subject. "Momma's boobs are really droppy so they must be extra real!!" I about died...you see she didn't say droopy like Anthony...no she said droppy even better. Of course my poor sister wanted to just die in front of Anthony's friends but she couldn't quit laughing long enough to do so.
I told you they were entertaining creatures. So ladies...enjoy your coconut boobs or your droopy/droppy boobs...whichever may fit you best!!
Sunday, February 18, 2007
Only a little drama...
Well last night turned out much better than expected. The boys got home about 10 till 7 which was not good. Teela and Eric had dinner reservations at 7:30 and Eric still had to drive to their house which is in North Reno. Eric never came in and when Dave came in I told him that was just a little inconsiderate that they got home so late when they both knew that Eric and Teela had dinner plans. I didn't say this rudely I just said her night is already partly ruined and then you guys coming home at this time is going to ruin dinner. He wrote her a text to apologize and even though she says that she isn't mad at him because she knows it is all Eric's fault, Dave is the one that drove and he could have said well let's go you have somewhere to be. Now Dave didn't see where he was responsible for Eric and I said he wasn't but he could have respected Teela because she is his friend too.
Well he told me that they went to our friend Steve's house because they owed Steve lunch for losing golf and that he didn't even sit down...see golf was over at 5 and they didn't get home till 7?? Not adding up. So I said see that is rude because you knew I wanted to see a movie and you knew Eric had plans so both of you should have said we have to get back to Reno. Well Dave CONVENIENTLY left out that they sat there and played pool! Teela called and said it was all Eric's fault because after he tried to blame everyone else for making him late, he let it slip that they played pool. Well I let Dave have it. If there is one thing I absolutely despise is people who lie...and lie about the dumbest most insignificant shit! I hung up with her and said why the hell didn't you tell me that? He informed me that he didn't lie he left it out (which makes me blow up even more because you are just being stupid!) and he did is so I wouldn't blow up at him. I quickly explained that I wasn't even annoyed with him that I just felt bad for Teela because what was supposed to be her Valentine's night was getting ruined and Valentine's Day is more important to some people than others. See Shannon, an I told you so was partly in order! Anyway...we got into a huge fight and I just said I am not going to be happy around you until you apologize and I don't want one right now so that you are just saying it to make me happy. You will actually think about why I am so angry now. Hello not telling me caused me to actually blow up and become furious with him. He thinks I have trust issues...they aren't trust issues they are issues that he can't be considerate and turns into macho chacho when he is with his friends. I don't think he is going to cheat so therefore it is not a trust issue in my book. It is with him I guess because he thinks I don't trust him to make good decisions around his friends. Hello, obviously he didn't! I absolutely hate liars I hate it! And if he is going to lie about something as stupid as playing two games of pool, what else does he lie about!!
On another point, because I knew that this golfing day with the boys was important I left him alone all day. Never once did I call or text or anything. Even when it was getting late and I didn't hear from him I didn't even text. Teela wanted me to to see where they were but I said no...I gave him his guy day all in peace. I was the only girlfriend that did this. Teela texted and talked to Eric all day...Jamie talked to Steve twice just while she was with me...and I left Dave alone. So I'm thinking he is going to be proud of me...he was and then when I said you could have texted me when you left Fernley (we always do that so we know about when the other person will be home so if they aren't we can worry about where they are) and he goes I thought about it but figured you were going to be mad. AH HA! Well shouldn't' that hurt my feelings because you are assuming that I am going to be mad...hello I wasn't even annoyed and I wouldn't have cared less what time he got home if I didn't know about Teela and Eric's plans. I told him I wasn't mad at him, I was just upset for her because their relationship is so rocky as it is, let the girl have one nice night. Dave said he thought it was weird that I didn't' text him all day, and I just said you were with the guys I didn't want to bother you. I think he just thought it was out of character for me...like I told him if I was really mad and wanted to know where he was trust I would have called or texted and he knows that. Maybe he actually missed me just sending a text to say hi or see how his day was...oh well he could have written me too if all his friends were busy with the girls.
All in all, we just had minimal chit chat and we will till he sees that stupid little lies are where my supposed trust issues come from. Teela and Eric didn't go to dinner and her night was completely ruined. And funny thing, no one went out dancing despite how hard Eric tried to get them to all come back into town. If he would have just let well enough be, no one's evenings would have changed.
We'll see how Dave wakes up this morning...I am awaiting my apology!
Well he told me that they went to our friend Steve's house because they owed Steve lunch for losing golf and that he didn't even sit down...see golf was over at 5 and they didn't get home till 7?? Not adding up. So I said see that is rude because you knew I wanted to see a movie and you knew Eric had plans so both of you should have said we have to get back to Reno. Well Dave CONVENIENTLY left out that they sat there and played pool! Teela called and said it was all Eric's fault because after he tried to blame everyone else for making him late, he let it slip that they played pool. Well I let Dave have it. If there is one thing I absolutely despise is people who lie...and lie about the dumbest most insignificant shit! I hung up with her and said why the hell didn't you tell me that? He informed me that he didn't lie he left it out (which makes me blow up even more because you are just being stupid!) and he did is so I wouldn't blow up at him. I quickly explained that I wasn't even annoyed with him that I just felt bad for Teela because what was supposed to be her Valentine's night was getting ruined and Valentine's Day is more important to some people than others. See Shannon, an I told you so was partly in order! Anyway...we got into a huge fight and I just said I am not going to be happy around you until you apologize and I don't want one right now so that you are just saying it to make me happy. You will actually think about why I am so angry now. Hello not telling me caused me to actually blow up and become furious with him. He thinks I have trust issues...they aren't trust issues they are issues that he can't be considerate and turns into macho chacho when he is with his friends. I don't think he is going to cheat so therefore it is not a trust issue in my book. It is with him I guess because he thinks I don't trust him to make good decisions around his friends. Hello, obviously he didn't! I absolutely hate liars I hate it! And if he is going to lie about something as stupid as playing two games of pool, what else does he lie about!!
On another point, because I knew that this golfing day with the boys was important I left him alone all day. Never once did I call or text or anything. Even when it was getting late and I didn't hear from him I didn't even text. Teela wanted me to to see where they were but I said no...I gave him his guy day all in peace. I was the only girlfriend that did this. Teela texted and talked to Eric all day...Jamie talked to Steve twice just while she was with me...and I left Dave alone. So I'm thinking he is going to be proud of me...he was and then when I said you could have texted me when you left Fernley (we always do that so we know about when the other person will be home so if they aren't we can worry about where they are) and he goes I thought about it but figured you were going to be mad. AH HA! Well shouldn't' that hurt my feelings because you are assuming that I am going to be mad...hello I wasn't even annoyed and I wouldn't have cared less what time he got home if I didn't know about Teela and Eric's plans. I told him I wasn't mad at him, I was just upset for her because their relationship is so rocky as it is, let the girl have one nice night. Dave said he thought it was weird that I didn't' text him all day, and I just said you were with the guys I didn't want to bother you. I think he just thought it was out of character for me...like I told him if I was really mad and wanted to know where he was trust I would have called or texted and he knows that. Maybe he actually missed me just sending a text to say hi or see how his day was...oh well he could have written me too if all his friends were busy with the girls.
All in all, we just had minimal chit chat and we will till he sees that stupid little lies are where my supposed trust issues come from. Teela and Eric didn't go to dinner and her night was completely ruined. And funny thing, no one went out dancing despite how hard Eric tried to get them to all come back into town. If he would have just let well enough be, no one's evenings would have changed.
We'll see how Dave wakes up this morning...I am awaiting my apology!
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