Monday, June 30, 2008
I got my flowers ordered too so that felt like a stress off my shoulders, but now the girls want to pick shoes. Thank god Shasta reminded me that we need the shoes before alterations. We have to have our dresses in the end of August for alterations and the shoes take 6-8 weeks to get here and get dyed. Hmm guess we should order those. Well some of the girls want heels, some need flats, some like this shoe but not that shoe. I really don't care if they are all the same shoes so long as they are the same color! So I want to schedule a day where we can go down there and have the girls that are here try on shoes so we can order them...but do you think I can get the three girls here together on the same day...of course not! They all have very different schedules!! So that is starting to feel like a stress.
Jewelry...I gotta find jewelry for the girls. Problem is I'm not good with that kind of stuff. I pick very plain things...I need to find something that is going to look good with the dresses and match the girls. I found one at David's Bridal, but hello it's like $40 X 6 bridesmaids? I don't think so! I would like my bridesmaids to go with me and look at this stuff. You know I had always envisioned us having days where we all go together have a nice lunch and then go look at wedding stuff. That has yet to happen. I really thought days like that would be fun...I really want them to come look at dresses or shoes and pick out jewelry with me but not so much.
Gifts for my bridesmaids! I really want to do these cute little photo albums for the girls...problem is I don't have enough pictures of me with all the girls. Chrissy, Kayla, Teela I'm good with. Monica I have a few...Shasta I don't have near enough and my sister I have like one or two! So that leaves me with either doing different presents for each of them or trying to find pictures of all of us together. I have a great idea for the one for Chrissy so I really don't want to have to do different presents. But then will the other bridesmaids feel like their present isn't good enough because it's not the same?? Any other good ideas on gifts for bridesmaids??
I planned way ahead and then it feels like it's all the little things that are creeping up on me. All the things that I said oh it will be nice to just have to do the little things during the summer and right before the wedding but all the big stuff will be out of the way. Uh it was the big stuff that seemed like it was easy and all the little stuff that is making me want to pull my hair out!!
Ahh...the joys of wedding planning
We were totally becoming that cute little couple. We did all the cutsie romantic things together and he was actually coming around to like this whole relationship thing. There was still just one thing missing...he had yet to say I love you.
I had said it plenty of times, but I backed off. You know you normally said it once a day or at least every other day to the one you love right. Well not me...I said it on days where I felt like I was going to burst if I didn't say it and then every once in a while. It sucks saying I love you to someone and not hearing it back. It would make for a very awkward moment you know. I figured he had come so far that if I had to wait a little longer than I expected to hear I love you then so be it. I didn't want to push him to say it, I wanted him to say it when he meant it.
Christmas Eve we opened our presents. He got me a few cute shirts and some other things that I had wanted. He actually did pretty good for being our first Christmas and then he got me a card. It was of course a funny sarcastic card, but the words he wrote on the inside were far from sarcastic and funny. He wrote the sweetest message about how I had changed his life and he was so glad that I was in it...you know all the mushy stuff that we girls swoon over. At the very bottom, he wrote I love you and signed his name. It was the best Christmas present I could have ever asked for. Of course I got all teary eyed because I knew he meant it. For the first time in my life I didn't feel like someone was just saying that to me to because enough time had passed. I felt like he truly loved me and it was a wonderful feeling.
**Little side note here, at our engaged encounter for the church, we had to write when we knew we loved our soon to be spouse. Dave actually wrote that he knew he loved me when we were on our first trip to Arizona when he was moving (he followed that sentence with a don't even ask why it took me so long to say it haha!). That's a whole year before he actually said it!! Ironically enough he also knew that I loved him when I agreed to go on that trip with him.**
The school year quickly came to an end. Elizabeth was going to be moving up to Washington to be with her husband since her contract at the school had ended. She was excited but I was a little bummed to have her be leaving. I really enjoyed her company and had a blast working with her and living with her. We joked that we were the lesbians at our school because we would drive to school together everyday and then we lived together. If people didn't know why she was living with me or why she didn't ever drive herself, I'm sure we looked a bit funny.
So Elizabeth moves out and now it's just me and Dave at the house. He was still struggling to define this "relationship" that he was in and wasn't sure what to do about actually calling me his girlfriend. It's been so long since I wrote about our story, I don't remember if I explained his fear. I'm sure I did but here it is again. You see just dating me and not defining it was a safe ground. If he labeled me as his girlfriend then for sure this would fail and all his relationship fears would come true. With Elizabeth gone, we had a lot of time to ourselves (obviously!) He got to where he would be more cuddly on the couch with me and he was starting to do things around the apartment like he lived there too. You see there was another glich...he never claimed to "live" with me. He would tell people including me that he was just staying there with me. Um ok...you never leave and you buy groceries and most of your clothes are here....but no he didn't live there in case you were wondering.
One night we were sitting on the couch and we were just talking. We were talking about the label of girlfriend and boyfriend and I explained to him that for me, without the label, that meant that there were no boundaries. I mean if he technically wasn't my boyfriend, then I could go on a date with another guy and sleep with him for all he cared because well I had no boundaries...he wasn't my boyfriend. And the same could be said for him (which he apparently used in the early parts as we so have read!!). He didn't much care for this thought and when I put it like this to him, he finally decided that he was going to give me the label that I so desired. Of course he didn't just come out and say yes we are boyfriend and girlfriend because that would have been too easy and a bit on the 12 year old side. He said something along the lines of well you already know you are my girlfriend, it's pretty obvious don't you think? I just have never called you that. Basically his theory was if it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, then it is a duck. We were dating, living together and being exclusive. Obviously we were boyfriend and girlfriend!
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Dave got a call that she was going to have surgery to have her gallbladder removed. You are all going to seriously go oh my god you are an awful person, but I'm going to be honest here folks...I can't even say I felt bad. It's like karma come around full force. That certainly didn't go over well with Dave...whoops! It was like she was trying to have this cry for attention because she was being all dramatic about it. Ok I probably would have been too if they were taking my gallbladder away, but I digress. She kept talking about how the boyfriend was going to be there and if we couldn't get ahold of her then we needed to call his phone because he would be all up to date! GAG!
I put a screeching halt to that shit right then and there. As a matter of fact we just got off the phone with her and I told her she needed to knock that shit off. First of all, she hasn't known this guy all that long...2 months max. He certainly doesn't need to be making major medical decisions for her should something go wrong. They aren't married and he should have no say in her medical decisions. Her daughter should be there with her...I know that role. Your parents are in the hospital and you should be there with them. Patty knows this role too and would agree that at times you need to be advocates for your parents and you certainly dont' need some trashy ass boyfriend in there making the decisions (ok I don't even know the guy so I should probably give him the benefit of the doubt for being a decent guy, but eh). While talking to her tonight we find out that it's actually a cyst on her liver and they are going to run more tests on her tomorrow to see what exactly is going on. The woman is scared and when I talked to her on the phone, I softened and felt bad. See I'm not as bad as you all thought I was going to turn out to be now am I! I quickly remembered that daughter at the hospital role and remembered that when you are scared, they are twice as scared and you need to be there for support. Well then..I guess I must assume that role again. Dave had called Kayla and told her that I made this really good point (apparently I didn't get too far on his bad side) about Rod not being allowed to make decisions about her. I said you know telling Kayla isn't enough...you really need to tell your mom. She is all oogly googly over him right now like a kid in high school...she probably named him at least 10 times just while I was talking to her! It's Rod this and Rod that...does Rod even know if you would like to be resuscitated or if you would like to be DNR?? Yeah I'm sure that was something clearly discussed on your first date right...NO! Well she was like oh I told him everything and I just listed him in case of emergency so they will tell him what's going on...yeah and then they will expect him to make that emergency call decision!!! Dave seemed to think that I needed to be the one to tell her this and I'm not sure why...I'll figure that out after I finish writing!
So anyway...tomorrow there are tests with radiation and hemascans (I think that's what they were called) and hopefully they would know more. I would greatly like my nurse friends Shawna and Lainey to weigh in on this topic and tell me what they think. I told her I thought she was too stressed at her job. You would think she was a lawyer or doctor. She runs a GoodWill...honestly it will go on without her. She was even getting calls about work at the hospital for gosh sakes...until the nurse said no more! So anyway my nursing friends...do tell what you know about this little situation. I'll keep you all up to date!
Friday, June 20, 2008
Starting Sunday night we went for a bike ride. It was a nice ride and we enjoyed it...until we came home and found that our dog had gotten out of his kennel. That is never a good thing because he destroys the house looking for Dave. You see our dog has seperation anxiety and a freaking bad case of it. So we put him in the kennel when we leave. Now he has figured out how to get out of it. Monday the same thing happened and then when we put him back in and Dave rigged the hell out of it with tie down straps thinking there's no way in hell he could possibly get out now...he got out again! We ran to PetSmart with literally 2 minutes before they close and bought a new kennel. I had a theory that when he got out of his kennel when we were in Texas, he bent the pegs of the door. So I figured (and prayed) that was why he was getting out and we figured that a new kennel would do the trick. You see he never used to get out of his kennel this is a new thing.
Even though we had the new kennel, I still wasn't brave enough to put him in it while we were gone on Tuesday. Fortunately the class I am currently in allows me to work in my classroom all day so I took him to school with me and he was exceptionally well behaved. That night we put him in his kennel while we went out to grab dinner and he did a good job. Wednesday he was in his kennel all day again and he did fine...Thursday too. So I was relaxing because obviously my theory was right and he was just getting out because that kennel was bent. My theory was right until last night when we came home from my softball game and he was out again. That little fucker keeps messing up my bread...sorry follow the side note here. You see when he gets out he knocks everything off of my kitchen counter. But he's got it out for my bread and my tortillas. He doesn't eat them, he just trampels them into dust. I have gone through 2 loaves of bread this week, both of which I haven't even gotten a piece of! Last night for good measure that fucker pissed on my bread! He didn't chew it at all...he knocked it off the counter into the middle of the kitchen floor and pissed on it! UGH!!!! Has he not seen the price of bread these days???
So today I went to the vet with him because he needs meds for this seperation anxiety. If meds don't help him, there's no way we can keep him and that makes me really sad. We already saved him from the pound when he was taken there in the first place, I don't want to have to be the person that has to take him somewhere and just leave him. So we are hoping that these meds work...my dog is officially now on prozac!!!
The next fun thing about my week is the MIL! Oh my god when I don't think I can possibly lose any more respect for the woman she reaches a new high (or rather low!) and proves me wrong. Now she is busy out drinking and driving while 4-wheeling! When her kids call her out on it, he responses vary from oh well it's not like we got in trouble, to oh my god we aren't going to wreck on the dirt roads (that don't happen to be maintained like normal streets and did I mention that it's in the dark when they are doing this!!!) Then she has some girl staying at her house that is like my age and her and Kayla want the girl to leave but no one will tell her to. So now she is busy having slumber parties! Then we talked about the wedding and she was shocked that she needed to pay for the DJ so soon (ok so we lied but the woman doesn't have a good track record with money) and was all put out. I got annoyed and Dave called her today and stood up to her which I was very proud of. He said you know we just don't want the time to come and then you tell us that you can't pay. He then reminded her that she said she was going to pay for the rehersal dinner too. Remember way back when when I said we wanted to see how much things cost and then we would let her know what we would like help with and she told me that she was going to pay for the DJ and the rehersal dinner because that's what Dave's aunt and uncle paid for last summer for their son's wedding? Yeah apparently she didn't remember. So then I started yelling in the background that it's ridiculous and if she would like I would jog her memory about the conversation where she told me this. Then she gets all defensive and says well what is your dad paying for...you know we should be splitting this in half! Yeah well he's paying for flowers and pictures...which cost more than what all she is paying for!! I'm even doing a BBQ for my rehersal dinner so that it's a little cheaper plus it's really what I want, but still it wont' be hardly anything at all for her to pay for that! God I swear I am just going to find the balls to just lay into her here soon!! I told Dave it's no skin off my back if she doesn't like me...my mom always had a saying when boyfriends broke up with me in high school. You lived without him the first 16 years of your life...you can live without him for the next 16. Well same can be said about her!!!
Needless to say I am sitting here drinking a glass of wine!! I think I might have found one I actually like!!
Monday, June 09, 2008
Thursday when we got there we just hung out around the house and visited with everyone. Denise, the boys' stepmom, had her son and his wife coming in that night at like 7 so we waited and when they got there we all had a nice dinner together. We ended up running to WalMart to buy Daunte, Dave's nephew a slip and slide because there is no grass for him to have one in Arizona...he loved it to say the least!! Here's a few pictures from that night!
Dave's mom and all her kids: Dave, Robert, Brian and Kayla
Me and Dave for one of our many pictures
Saturday was graduation. Robert woke me up very early to ask me if I would go shopping with him. He said his girlfriend had called and she was worried because he didn't have slacks to wear and a tie. So at 7am we were off to find him some cute clothes. He said he picked me because I could color coordinate and make him look good (my sister said he must be blind haha! She thinks I have no fashion sense!). It was fun because he and I went alone and we got to spend some time together. Here's how he looked before graduation. I think I did a pretty good job.
We headed to graduation and Dave's mom and grandma became huge pains. They kept calling because we were running behind and they were freaking out. I'm shocked they made it there on time! But they called like 5 times in 3 minutes no exaggeration either! The graduation was good and we got lots of cute pictures afterwards. Here's just a few! The last two are from his graduation party. That was a lot of fun too and there are seriously too many pictures! So I just picked my two favorties haha!
Robert, Denise and Bruce
Us with Robert
All the kids
Robert and his parents
Robert and his pretty girlfriend Courtney
I ♥ my brother in law!
I love this raspberry rum stuff!!
So Dave's mom did end up coming to the graduation party. Bruce was nice to her and she was bitter through much of the evening. She made several comments that a lot of the stuff they had up on the walls was stuff that her and Bruce had in their house. She was very scarce much of the night and either hung out with the boys or tried to avoid everyone all together. I think she stayed a little over an hour and then used some dumb excuse that she had to get back before it was dark. I said I thought that was dumb (she chose to stay on the opposite side of town instead of where she was originally going to stay) and that there was no reason for her not to stay for a while. She said she just wanted to leave and was acting all poor pitty me and I just said that it was time for me to go outside before some heads had to roll. I didn't even get up to acknowledge her leaving. Bruce laughed at this and said are you the one in there talking all naughty? I said if you mean regarding your ex-wife why yes I am! The kids all said that he wouldn't talk bad about her to anyone...I proved them wrong! I told him I didn't agree with the way that she treated her kids and that she wasn't even going to come out there for the party. His jaw dropped and I said that I told her she was going because the weekend wasn't about her it was about Robert! Then after Bruce had a few more cocktails he really let it fly with me and we sat and laughed forever!! We asked him and Denise to be a part of our wedding and Denise said oh jesus that isn't going to go over well! Again I said you know what...it's not about her it's about us and David would like to acknowledge you as a set of parents at his wedding so she can get over herself!! Denise about died and I said you've heard of a sperm donor...at times I think she was just an incubation pod and then we all had a good laugh! Raspberry rum will do that to you.
Overall the mom was pretty nice to me. She tried to be nice anyway and at times was like over the top nice...to the point of being fake! We shall see how she continues. Her husband just left this weekend so now she is free of that. She still has the divorce and stuff but I'm sure she'll be out acting like a teenager here real soon!!