Cross your fingers and all other lucky charms!

We leave for Disneyland in two weeks...this time in two weeks we will be in California! Chrissy and her husband are going down there with us. We planned this as a little birthday treat for Dave because he loves Halloween and his birthday is tomorrow. So the four of us thought it will be fun to go down there and do Disneyland and Knotts SCARY Farm (not sure I will like that because I HATE to be scared but I''ll suck it up for the other three that are going to enjoy it!). I'm excited for a vacation but I'm more anxious than anything and here's why:

I think (hope/pray) that Dave is going to propose while we are there! Here's why I think that: He told me so! Ok let me explain...a while back my friend Christine (not Chrissy) said that if she was me she wouldn't still be with Dave...she alluded to the fact that he is not worth waiting for and that he should have already made that kind of a committment. Well obviously I don't agree or I wouldn't still be dating him. I do think he is more than worth the wait and I know that we will be married so I've been ok about the whole thing. Anyway, her comment just hurt my feelers on that particular day and I came home and made the mistake of telling him about our conversation. This BLEW UP!!!! He basically had nothing nice to say about her...he was mad that I was letting my friends influence what I thought (he neglected to hear that I did NOT AGREE WITH HER!!!!!!!!) and basically just blew up at me. We got into a huge fight and I was trying to explain that I was just making the comment not agreeing or looking for info from him. In this process of losing his cool, he said and I quote! "Do you want to know when I was going to propose...do you?!@?!?!?!?!" Of course I said NO! Begging him not to tell me this because while I am fine knowing that it is coming I want no further details as to when/where/how. Well being that he was mad at HER he ruined MY proposal. He told me that he wanted to do it in Disneyland with both of our families there. TIME OUT! I don't want our families there...if it's Chrissy and Eric with us fine...but not all of our families no thank you! TIME IN! I was livid...why did he have to ruin that for me when he was mad at her?? I pointed out that if this is what he wanted then he should have been more active about getting Chrissy and Eric not to go (or go if he didn't care if they were there) and that if it was to be a surprise he needed to get the families to go and not tell me...clearly he couldn't leave the planning to me because I wouldn't know about a surprise so I wouldn't know to invite our gosh damn families! Anyway...I dropped it from that point on. I told him that I was going to be upset because I want the proposal that he had originally planned of course I wouldn't get it becuase now I knew about it. So I dropped it...I played dumb (not that he is dumb and thinks I don't remember) like I forgot all about him ever saying that. Ready for the irony of this situation? My sister and her family are going the same time as us now. Not becuase he called and said hey go so i can propose no no! Because they had to postpone their trip because my neice broke her leg! So if you are following this all...his little plan is just going to fall into place...right into his lap without him doing any work for it. His mom has called and wanted to know when we were going becuase they were going in November...hmmmm really! Now they might also be going the same time!

Here's my thoughts: Either he just said that at the time to hurt my feelings because he was made at Christine or that was really his plan. If it was his plan, I really hope he goes through with it because I want the proposal that he originally had planned not something new. If he just said it to hurt my feelings, I will be upset because how rude to do that! So those could be the reasons why he wouldn't propose, thus upsetting me. My other thought...my plan worked and he goes through with it (this could be my nerves about it actually happening or thinking that it might causing me to have the freak out crush from the previous blog), thus making me happy! Honestly I don't think he will do...because I have an idea so he won't go through with it. I would truly be surprised if he did it because while I have an idea I'm not expecting it because he knows I know (make sense?) But he keeps saying how excited he is to go to Disneyland and he has been super lovely the past few weeks (hence the happy couple...why am I freaking out again). Either way...

CROSS YOUR FINGERS AND ALL OTHER LUCKY CHARMS FOR ME! Update to obviously follow. What do you all think...pick it all apart and tell me how much I'm reading into apparently everything in life right now! :)